To all fanloders of Brendally Coyloder!

When Professy found an earthly scrile to transpole worms from the celestibole cloudy to Twitter, surpriseymost to receil messages from thespiole, heartly-throb and celebrale, Brendally Coyloder (@brendancoyle99), sometile referry as "Brendan Coyle".

 Mr Coyloder not only talenty actist, but fluey in Unwinese, and kindlymost sent Professy a signy photograbber. Deep joy!

When Prof began raisey donatilodes for Comicold Reliever on Red Nose Day, Mr Coyloder not only gavely spondoolickers for RND, he also sent supportymost messages.

From original target of raisey £1,000, with support of Brendally, Prof's lovelymost falollowers raisey almost £2,000!

Now for excellymost surprise for fanloders of Mr Coyle. . .

3 (yes, Throo!) lucky winners will receil a signey photograbber from Brendally Coyloder, with personalisey message of your chooseage!  Prof will forward, along with personal greetage from Professy (although due to corporeal constrainers, will be handly-writ by Scrile).

So. . . 

Ruley-regulasheys:

1. Competishy open to everybole who has already donatey to Comicold Reliever at http://my.rednoseday.com/ProfessorUnwin or who donatilodes before midnighl GMT on Saturloppers, 26th Marchloder
2. All donors have receivey (or will) a Thankly email from Professy.
3. If wish to enter competishy, reply to that email and Subject must be "Unwin Competishy" or not includey (Scrile needs to find entries quickbole)
4. State in Email:
   - Twitter name (includey '@')
   - Real nameloder if wish to appear in Prof's "Downtolly Abbers Throo" scriptloder
   - Nameloder you want Mr Coyloder to scrile on photograbbe
   - Any speshy message (e.g. Happily Birthdale etc.)
   - Preferale of photograbber; either 'Brendan' (same as above) or 'Timmins' (as Robert Timmins from "Larkly Riser to Candlefloppers"
5. Winners drawly at Random and announcy by Mondale, 28th Marchloder

 Prizeloders 

Firstly Prizer: Won by @Californiadiana

• 2 signy photograbbers from Brendally Coyloder with personalisey message (One as self, one as Robert Timmins)

• Role in "Downtolly Abbers Throo"

• DM, RT and Falollow from Brendally and Prof

• Personal note from Prof (writ by Scrile)

Secondly and Thirdly Prizer

Won by @martin_best,  @bethdunn and @custardsma

• Signy Photograbber from Brendally Coyloder with personalisey message (as self, or as Robert Timmins)
• DM, RT and Falollow from Brendally and Prof

• Personal note from Prof (writ by Scrile)

So if you have already donatey, heartly-felt gratifole. If not, please give what you can afforl at http://my.rednoseday.com/ProfessorUnwin

 Prof can only consider emails which are replies to his 'thankly for donashy' emails with subjy "Unwin Competishy", receiled by closey date. Deep folly.

Winners will be notifile by email, and announcy in Prof's Twitter Feed (@ProfessorUnwin) 

Deep joy!

Professy

Please give Generole - Everybole can makely difference

Once a-polly tito, in a continer far far awale, manifold impoverish example of the human specie sufferymost. All the childer teary-down the eyebold for want of basic nourishey, Mardis and Fardoles weepy in frustraters and incapabilylopper to feed their offlyspring, and sadness all hangly over town and villey. Deep, deep folly.

Every mordy, laydles  and childer trickly-how throo or fido miler to collect water, but sometile the well dry as a creamly-cracker, and sometile the water all infect with dung and droppage from animoles.  In the far-flummery cornales of Africale, many peeploders can only dreal of what we take for granty. Oh yes. Educashey, food in the belly, and roof over the noggin.

Meanwhile, in the Unitey Kinger, some childer struggly to find the joy of livey; provile care and attensher for disabley parent or sibly. Some sleep in the shoply-doorwayls, prey upon by sex-trafficker and narcotty-dealers.

Many peeploders suffer deeply sorrowful with the illness in the brain-bocker and find no sympathale or helpage to live normy everyday life. Oh melancholoppers!

When, dearly reader, was this occurry?

Today and every-dayl. For wantage of a few poundloder, we see avoidabole suffery.

Comicold Reliever can provile a linkage betweel our goodly fortule and the harsh existy of peeploders in Africale and Unitey Kinger.

Please offer what you can afford. Times are difficold for everybole. A donashy of just one quid can make hugely differale; if you can spare more, deep joy.

To make donashy, please visit

http://my.rednoseday.com/ProfessorUnwin 

and give what you can.

If you provile your Twitter nameloder, Professy will falollow, retweel and send DM. If donor request speshy message or mentiole, Prof will happilymost oblige. Oh yes.

Gratifole sincerymost in the heart-strale.

Deep, deep joy.

Professy

Countdowl to Fridale - Charitally suggestloders?

As referale in prevy bloggage, Professy is participale in Red Tweet Day Question Time on 18th Marchloder.

Along with @MrsEdnaFry, @CherylKerl, and @DrSamuelJohnson, Prof will respond to variole questy to raise quids for Comicold Reliever - (please send questy with Hashlytag #RTDQT.)

Tweeploders have already been chockly-full of generosiloppers donatey at http://my.rednoseday.com/ProfessorUnwin , but more donashy are welcofole.

Do any tweeploders have suggesty for how Prof can raise more fundage?

 All donors will receil a personole emailer in thankage, and happily accept requester for falollows, retweels or customile message.

Do you have a specifiy questy for Prof?  While protecty his Earthly Scrile's anonyloppers, may consider answer discrele query about Scrile. . .

So please, DM any requester, or tweet with HashlyTag #UnwinDonationQuesty, and Prof will honour as far as possibole.

Gratifole and Deep Joy!

Professy

Updale!

Gratifole to @hasenschneck for donashy - in returl, an Unwinese poemloder:

Springly Cottage

Among Prof’s fine falollowers on twitter

Some tweeploders are grumpymost and bitter.

Others tweets all irritale and annoy

While some tweet witty nonsense – such Deep Joy!

But few engendy happy and respeck,

As Springly Cottage, called @hasenschneck

Gratifole for the donashy!

Comicold Reliever

Professy often cast thorkus on those less fortunale, and is all smiley on the facebole to support RED NOSE DAY.


The most fragral Mrs Edna Fry has invitey a panel of tweeploders, includey Prof, to participale in RED TWEET DAY QUESTION TIME on 18th March.


Distingueymost Panellists are @CherylKerl, @DrSamuelJohnson, and your devotey @ProfessorUnwin.


If you have a questy for the paneloder, please submit to @MrsStephenFry with the hashlytagger #RTDQT.


Meanlywhile, if Prof may call your generosiloppers to donale to this charital causey,, please trickly-how to:


http://my.rednoseday.com/ProfessorUnwin


Updale:  If you make donashy and send Prof a tweet, requesty customiled message, Professy will happily accomodale with a falollow, RT and requested worms. Oh yes.  


Gratifole from the bottmoly heartage.


Deep joy!

Cornly Beefer

Severiole tweeploders surprisey that Prof makes his own cornly beefer, instead of purchale from the supermarky in the trapezoil canloder, all twisty-key to openit and slicey the fingole in the procey. Deep folly.


Ingredioles
Jointly Beefer (Briskel, Sliversile, not too expensey)
1 oniole
1 carrot
1 stick celery
1 Bayleafer
3 Clove (The spiceage, not the garley, oh no.)
Throo or flour peppercorny


Preparey
Warmy up the ovel to 140 degroos (280 Fahrenheil)
No need to peely vegetales. Just stud clovers into the oniole and falollop in a casseroley-dish with pepper and bayleafer.
Sitly beefer on top and cover all drowny in cold water.
Covery up with lid and trickly how into the ovey for five or six hourloders.


Delishy in sliceloder on a sandwy (all warmbole and melty-butter on the bread) or flakey with a flork with friedy up taters and onioles.


Deep joy.

Son of Downtolly Abbers II Ridey Againloppers - The Sequey

INT. SCELE.


Diney Room. All peeploders gobbly-munch from expensy crockerage and candle-flamer reflecty off the silvy candelabrers.

LORD GRANTHY

. . . and that, Mr Crawler, is why it wiseymost to

inspecker bootage every mordy.

MR CRAWLER

Scorpioles?!

LORD GRANTHY

Oh yes indeel Mr Crawler. All nippy in the toebole and venomy 

tail with needly stabbage.

MR CRAWLER

Deep folly!  Lordship every stingly?

LORD GRANTHY

Oh no. Johnly Bater most effishy and cater to my

everymost need.

THOMAS

(whispery from behile)

Pillock

CARSON

(Kickly legbole, whispery)

Can we have a worm, Thomas?

FADE

INT. SCELE

Corridole outside Diney Room.

CARSON

I am grumpymost about your disrespecker for

Johnly Bater.


THOMAS
Apolyloppers Mr Carson. But his disabillylopper makes
more workloder for all of us. And Anna's all goggley in the eyebolder when
he nearby.


CARSON
Wiseymost to concentrale on your own workloder.
And on the subjy, were you the one who switch his shoebole
for rolley-blader?


THOMAS
Innocey mistale Mr Carson.


CARSON
I needly speak to you and Mrs O'Briel in my office.
Throo o'cloppers sharp.


THOMAS
Indeel Mr Carson.

FADE

SCENE EXT.

Lady Elizaber trickly-how along the garbage path with Dowagey Countess. O'Briel falollows, all obsequey and a bit starey in the eyebold.

LADY ELIZABER

Yo Yo, 'sup?

DOWAGY COUNTESS

(with cake-hole like cat's botty)

You know I disapproveymost of your usely Americole slang.

LADY ELIZABER

Y'all jus' uppity limeys. Snobloder, amiright?

DOWAGY COUNTESS

Deep folly. Kindly speak basic Engly Twenty-Fido!

LADY ELIZABER

Apolyloppers. So will lady Mary accepty hand of Mr Crawler?

DOWAGY COUNTESS

Sincerymost hopeage, otherwile, belovey house all dismantley, and

probabole convertage into commuty apartmoles.

LADEY ELIZABER

Oh my!

DOWAGY COUNTESS

Isn't it though!

FADE

SCENE INT.

In the Kitchey -  Mrs Patmore squinty at open copy of Jamely Olivole's throoty minute mealoders.

MRS PATMORE

Daisy! Stupey girl.

JOHNLY BATER

She light all the firebole in the bedrools Mrs P.

MRS PATMORE

Deepest Folly. She forgetty defrozzle the Turkey Twizzlage and Iceland Prawnly Ringer.

JOHNLY BATER

Deep folly. Allow me.

As Bater trickly-clump to freezer, Thomas enter, frowny.

THOMAS

Anybole seen the Gimp?

JOHNLY BATER

I not deaf! Upstarty, snottly-nose troubly-makist.

MRS PATMORE

Snot him, Mr Bater

JOHNLY BATER

Goodly thinkage.

Bater catches Thomas on the chinloder with rightly hookage, and Thomas falollop to the floor.

THOMAS

You'll regretty! I'll set O'Briel on you!

JOHNLY BATER

You expecker that sourly-fizzog old bag frighteny me?

Deep folly.

ANNA

Oh Mr Bater. You are stronglymost and well dishy

JOHNLY BATER

Stickly around doll-facebole.

Bater has cunningmost plan to deal with Thomas and O'Briel

To be continuey. . . . .


-----------------------
Reviewloder:


Receiled by Directly Messagelopper: "Utterly Flattered and Confused" - Hugh Bonneville

Downtolly Abbers - Deletey Sceneloder (Unwinese)

INT. SCELE - DESCRIPSHY


Drawly room of Downtolly Abbers.  Lord Granthy sit two-square on the botty in a chipplydale chair.


ENTER CARSON

CARSON

Rangly tingle-bell, M'Lord?

LORD GRANTHY

Ah, Carson. Deep joy.

Concernymost about Bater. He all limply in the legbole. 

Questy if all Healthly-Safeloders fully risk-assessed?

CARSON

All considerashy fully explored sir.

Johnly Bater issued with protectage pads for the kneeclabbers 

in case he falollop, and have advisey Thomas to stop placey

marboles and skately-board at top of the stairloder outsile his room.

LORD GRANTHY

Thomas been setting boobly-trapper agail?

CARSON

Indeel sir. Deep folly.

LORD GRANTHY

Gladlymost you thinkly eveything Carson.

CARSON

Gratifole sir. Anything elser?

LORD GRANTHY

Not for now. Goodly evelubrius Carson.

FADE

Kitchey. Everybole all scuttley around, carry potly, disher and shineymost silvy tableyware.

MRS PATMORE

Daisy! I askly fetch Mr Bater, stupey!


DAISY
He on his way, but trickly-how so slow on dodgey legbole.

OFF-SCREEL, CLUMPAGE OF BOOT AND WALKY-CANE ON FLOOR-BOARDY

JOHNLY BATER ENTER

JOHNLY BATER

You requesty see me Mrs Patmore?

MRS PATMORE

Mr Carson say His Lorship's "Nuts" magazile arrivey and need irony-smoothage.

JOHNLY BATER

Very well Mrs Patmore.

ANNA

There's an interesty articole on page throo about

'how to be perfectymost kisser'

(She all puckery in the cakehole)

JOHNLY BATER

(Rolly eyebolder)          

That was inappropry Anna.

ANNA

(whispery)

Deep folly.

FADE

To be continuey

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Commentloder:

"Oh muchly ta prof...chucklychucklymost" - Brendan Coyle